Twilight: Rewritten (Prologue)

I realize it's been month since I've posted anything. Honestly, as much as I've been saving writing prompts on Pinterest and all, I simply haven't had any actual desire to write. However, as I was cleaning out the trunk of my car earlier today, I came across a box of books that had been sitting there for I'm going to say well over a year. They're all books bound for Goodwill, but me being me, I went through to make sure there was nothing that I wanted to keep. Among the various books was the Twilight series, four of the books I hate most. Out of random curiosity and a half-assed desire to try to once again understand why these books are so popular, I flipped through the first one and was once again massively unimpressed. The concept was still spectacularly stupid to me and the writing awful. Not that I can really talk since I can't say if my writing is any better, but then again, nothing I've ever written has gotten on the New York Times Best Seller list. And as most people know the popular Fifty Shades of Grey series originated as a Twilight fanfiction before the names were changed and it was published. Well, flipping through the book, I decided that I wanted to attempt my own "fanfiction" piece, except that I'm not a fan and my idea was rather darker and more in the typical vampire theme. If you've read Twilight, you know it starts with a prologue. Below is my prologue. I'd love some genuine feedback if it sounds interesting and if I should continue. I may continue anyways, but feedback always helps. ;)

Forever. That’s what he’d told me, what he promised me. An eternity together. He wouldn’t lie to me, he couldn't. Why would he when he so clearly loved me; it was in his every look, his every move. It couldn’t all be a lie, could it? I raised my hands to cover my face, to block out the sight before me, and found myself staring at blood, my blood, covering my hands like a scarlet glove. My breath caught in my throat as I stared, my mind struggling to understand all that had transpired within the last hour.

I slowly raised my eyes to his, hoping beyond hope to see even a glimmer of affection. I saw nothing. I looked up into the eyes that had once been so filled with love and finally understood. I had fallen for a monster. I let out a short, hysterical laugh as the pieces slowly fell into place, as I was finally forced to face and accept the inevitable. I was an instrument, his instrument, only wanted and useful until the job was completed. And now, the job was done; I was of no more use to him. A cold smile spread across his lips as he saw the veil lift, as I saw him for who he truly was: a master of manipulation.

I stood up painfully, every inch of my body screaming in protest. His eyes flared with interest, clearly wondering if his prey was going to put up a fight. I, however, had no intention of fighting him, I saw no point in delaying the inevitable. But even as he stalked me, I was once again struck by his beauty, his gracefulness. I was no longer under his spell though and for the first time, I saw just how terrible and dangerous his beauty was. How could I have been so blind? Looking back, it was so easy to see that he was using me. As tears slowly trailed down my cheeks, I turned away from him and pressed my palms against the cool glass of the window. The sun was just beginning to rise over the treetops in all its glory. I drank in the sight for a long moment, thankful that beauty, not darkness would be the last thing I saw. I slowly closed my eyes and waited.